


Heart to Hear

by Annabelleleigh73



Series: Supernatural AU one shots [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: ASL, American Sign Language, F/M, Fluff, Hearing Impaired, Humancas!, cas, fluffy fluff, unnamed original female character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-06-04 11:26:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6656023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annabelleleigh73/pseuds/Annabelleleigh73
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is a widowed father who employs a live in nanny<br/>(Yeah..yeah...so original...not so much...but it was fun nevertheless ;p )</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heart to Hear

**Author's Note:**

> Although I am not hearing impaired, my father is. Life might have been easier (and less loud and frustrating) if he had chosen learn ASL as a child instead of being a stubborn...um...mule.  
> I do not wish to offend anyone who is fluent in ASL. This story idea came to me and I ran with it, I don't want it to be perceived as disrespectful using hearing loss for a story prompt.

This time away had seemed harder, an amazing feat since all the other times had seemed almost unbearable. He reasoned it was probably because this was the last stretch before his new position was finalized but he was kidding himself. He knew it was because of her and the kids.  
The cab pulled away from the curb at the passenger pick up outside the airport and Cas let his head fall back in exhaustion as he replayed last long work trip he had taken and the reunion after. It was something he had not allowed himself to do much while he was gone, the thinking of home and hearth only focusing on the job, now he indulged in the luxury. Eyes closed, small smile he remembered what had happened many months ago.  
\------  
They had all picked him up from the airport that time since it had been an early morning arrival. He could hear them before they even got close, his children practically yelling to be heard by their nanny who was white knuckling the steering wheel as they approached.  
"There he is! There he is!", Cas's eight year old son, Noah yelled tapping her shoulder. His twin brother, Seth, was waving eagerly from the window as his two and half year old daughter, Nora, squealed excitedly from her car seat between them.

The young woman nodded as she slowly pulled up to the curb and Cas laughed at her scowling face when the front passenger tire bumped and scraped against it. She didn't drive much.  
The young woman unclenched her white knuckle grip from the steering to release the trunk latch and Cas stowed his bags. He walked rapidly to the driver side and tapped loudly but she shook her head. He grinned with a sigh, she was stubborn. He slid quickly into the passenger seat to the excited chatter of his children.  
Glancing over he noticed she didn't have her hearing aids in. Probably wise but it required him to tap her arm and employ his limited sign language, mostly depending on her ability to read lips. Again he berated himself at beginning to learn ASL only within in the last year.  
"Hello.", he said as he waved. "Thank you for picking me up." He signed thank you, feeling confident in his knowledge of that simple sign. She grinned and waved quickly before growing immediately serious, brow furrowed and hands clenching the wheel as she began the nerve wracking journey back home several miles away from the airport.

Once they were home, the kids tumbled out like puppies, the boys having unlatched their sister and they began unloading their father's bags. As they did so, Cas reached over and gently uncurled her fingers from around the leather encased steering wheel, the material slick with her nervous sweat. He massaged her cramped hands, looking down as he did so.  
"Oh, I have missed you. It does my heart good to see you and the kids."  
She knew he was speaking and lifting her hands bumped his chin to lift his head. She arched an eyebrow in question and he said, "I have missed you guys." Her confusion cleared and she grinned, her hands beginning to move, "They have missed you as well."  
"Just the kids? What about you?", he, for some reason, being able to understand her better than he was able to sign.  
A slight blush painted her cheeks and she gave a one shoulder shrug. "They listen better when you are here." was her admission.  
He smiled knowing his kids would sometimes ignore her whistle that she blew occasionally to gain their attention from the other parts of the house. He reached over and lifted the whistle,"Have they been giving you trouble, Fräulein?"  
She batted his hand away, "No more than their father, Captain." He grinned at the banter concerning her favorite movie.   His eyes dimmed, saddened a bit at her inability to no longer clearly hear the dialogue and music but her eyes brightened at the reference.  
"Lunch is ready, sandwiches I made ahead.", she told him with a flurry of fingers before turning away to leave the car.  
"I love you.", he whispered to her back, knowing she wouldn't hear, feeling like the coward he was.  
\---  
She had come to live with them two years ago prior during one of the darkest times in his life. His wife of six years had died unexpectedly six months before during the birth of their daughter. Cas thought he would never climb out of that dark pit. For a long time, he didn't care if he ever did.  
It had been almost three weeks before he had allowed himself to look at his infant daughter, let alone hold her. He couldn't even bring himself to name her, her name being given by his sister and mother, chosen from a list of names he and his wife had complied months before. The boys had helped with the naming, taking the roles of big brothers very seriously.  
The brothers were fiercely protective of the little girl and there were very few people they had allowed to care for her in those early months.  The circle included himself, his sister, and his mother. This proved very difficult in hiring someone to help, as his sister and mother had their own lives, their own responsibilities. It had been six months and twice as many caregivers before she had answered the classified ad.  
Cas had been very hesitant in hiring her given the fact that she was hearing impaired, having lost most of her hearing from a childhood illness, rarely verbally speaking choosing instead to speak with ASL. The boys were taken with her immediately and he reluctantly agreed to a trial of six weeks, which he completely forgot about after the first two weeks. She had proven she was capable and he was relieved that his sons no longer gave him grief concerning "nasty nannies". Other than his sister and mother, she was the only caregiver his daughter had ever truly known. Her only idea of what a mother was.  
He had thrown himself into work, staying away for extended periods of time until about a year ago when she had confronted him on his way to meet his cab ride to the airport. She stood in front of the door, one arm wrapping around her waist, the other hand holding a note. She seemed nervous and furious at the same time.  
Impatient he had snatched the note, having not learned any signs, unlike his sons who could converse with her almost fluently. Even his daughter was speaking more clearly in sign than verbally. He stubbornly refused to learn, depending on her notes and her ability to read lips for communication.  
His face drew dark while the reading the note and he crumpled it up in fury.  
"How dare you?", he snapped, "You have no right to say these things."  
Her hands were a flurry of motion and her face was as equally angry.  
"I don't understand.", he grated stubbornly but he had an idea that she was repeating what she had written.  
"You are their father and they need you. You are never home more than a few days at a time. They miss you even when you are here." She reached out and thumped his chest demanding an answer she agreed with.  
He glared at her, "You are their nanny. A paid employee. You are not their mother. I will decide what is best for my children."  Her accusation had hit a nerve yet he chose not acknowledge she spoke truth.  
Her face immediately grew sad and she handed him another note, "I cannot stay here and watch these children pine for a parent that they still have. This is my two week notice." Panic immediately set in.  
"What I am suppose to do?", he demanded, yelling, more frightened now than angry not caring if she understood or not.  
"I am just an employee.", she signed and then wrote it down furiously on the small note pad she carried, her pencil strokes almost ripping the paper in her anger. He had glared at her, furious, until he noticed the tears that were flowing unabashedly down her cheeks and he felt shame. His head fell forward and his shoulders slumped in defeat. Pulling his phone out, he called his business partner bowing out of this trip. His partner of fifteen years and best friend of twenty five, sighed in relief. He had been watching Cas steadily kill himself with work and there was nothing he had been able to do to change his behavior.  
Cas spent the next few weeks getting to know his sons once again and introducing himself to his daughter. Allowing himself to love them.

It was almost a year later when he had realized he also loved the one he entrusted their care to. That was six months ago and he still didn't have the courage to tell her. Instead he would say it when her back was turned or her attention was else where. He had a moment of panic recently when his daughter had heard him and began walking around and like a little mockingbird sang, "Love you...love you" in her lispy voice. The young woman had huffed her mostly silent laugh and signed back when she noticed, "Love you too." before giving the toddler a hug.  
He felt like a idiotic school boy, finding reasons to spend time with her, rationalizing his interest was strictly because of the mutual vested interest of the kids, but he knew better. He reasoned he had actual need to touch her arm often to gain her attention, even when she wore her hearing aids and who was to question if he kept his hand on her arm just a little longer than necessary.  
He sighed heavily taking his bags up to his room. He knew his wife would have approved of this woman who had unknowingly made whole new room in his heart, sharing it with his wife's memory, helping him repair his heart for  his children, to rebuild it strong.  
Placing his bags on the bed, he heard her climb the stairs and knock on the door frame, she knowing he would hear her summons.  
"I love you.", he said solemnly to the counterpane before turning with a smile, hating his cowardice. She smiled in return and told him lunch was ready. He nodded and she followed him downstairs. He could hear the soft pat of her bare feet on the wooden stairs and he heard her hand slide with a soft swoosh down the wooden bannister. These sounds were comforting, And Cas surprised her and himself when he took her hand before she let it slip off the polished wood.  
Startled she looked at him, their faces almost eye level his head still topping hers by a couple of inches, regardless of her being two steps above him.  
"I missed you.", he spoke slowly so she could see his lips. Her cheeks bloomed and she tried to pull her hand away and he knew she would try to deflect the statement to include all of them. He tightened his grip and leaned a bit forward, his forehead almost touching hers.  
"I...missed...you.", he enunciated each word, looking at her intently. Her eyes were on his lips and they darted up to his eyes once he stopped talking. He released her hand to sign out the next as he spoke. He had rehearsed this bit for weeks never thinking he would ever have the guts to say it and yet, he surprised himself again. His voice trembled as he also spoke the words that he signed.  
"I miss you every time I leave. You brought me back from the edge for which I am grateful. You brought me back to my children. I love you." He ended the rehearsed speech with his own sign for her name, her first initial placed over his heart which he tapped twice.  
Her eyes had widened during his confession and she stood there motionless for several heartbeats. He began to regret his rashness, thinking he might have jeopardized any relationship that they had. He closed his eyes and released her hand covering his eyes with his own trembling hand.  
He was a fool.  
He took a step back, almost stumbling down the last two steps in his haste to flee.  
"Stop."  
He froze. Her spoken voice. Rarely used except in emergencies: his son running with a sharp stick, his daughter approaching the busy street beside the park, his running away.  
She grasped his sleeve and he looked down at the fingers holding tight to the fabric, fingers that had always spoke truth.  
She spoke again, her tone sounding flat and rough with disuse, but singing to his ears, beautiful to his heart, "I love you."  
He turned back to face her, hope brightening his eyes. Her hands became a flurry of motion and he was able to pick up only half of what she was saying.  
He grabbed her hands and whispered, "You talk too much, Fräulein.", before he kissed her. And he could hear his children giggling behind him.  
\-------  
Cas's eyes flew open when the cabby announced, "Hey, buddy, we're here. And it looks like your fan club is waiting."  
He looked over at his now almost ten year old sons, his daughter who was now enrolled in preschool, and his wife, holding the reason they didn't meet him this time at the airport. Their four week old son, Nathaniel.  
The kids ran up laughing and squealing to hug him and take his bags.  
He walked up to his wife, taking the infant from her, greeting him with a soft hello and a kiss on his downy head. Her hands were a flurry of movement as he passed the baby to his capable older brother.  
"You still talk too much, Fräu Novak.", he signed before kissing her silent and still.

**Author's Note:**

> How was it? Please feel free to comment, criticize, critique ;) 
> 
> If the reponse is positive, I might write another one shot from the OFC's POV of this story.


End file.
